Funny but Frustratingly True

Noah in 2009

In the year 2009, the Lord came unto Noah, who was now living in the United States, and said, "Once again, the earth has become wicked and over-populated, and I see the end of all flesh before me. Build another Ark and save 2 of every living thing along with a few good humans."

He gave Noah the blueprints, saying, "You have 6 months to build the Ark before I will start the unending rain for 40 days and 40 nights."

Six months later, the Lord looked down and saw Noah weeping in his yard - but no Ark.

"Noah!" He roared, "I'm about to start the rain! Where is the Ark?"

"Forgive me, Lord," begged Noah, "but things have changed. I needed a building permit. I've been arguing with the inspector about the need for a sprinkler system. My neighbors claim that I've violated the neighborhood zoning laws by building the Ark in my yard and exceeding the height limitations. We had to go to the Development Appeal Board for a decision.

Then the Department of Transportation demanded a bond be posted for the future costs of moving power lines and other overhead obstructions, to clear the passage for the Ark's move to the sea. I told them that the sea would be coming to us, but they would hear nothing of it

Getting the wood was another problem. There's a ban on cutting local trees in order to save the spotted owl. I tried to convince the environmentalists that I needed the wood to save the owls - but no go!

When I started gathering the animals, an animal rights group sued me. They insisted that I was confining wild animals against their will. They argued the accommodation was too restrictive, and it was cruel and inhumane to put so many animals in a confined space.

Then the EPA ruled that I couldn't build the Ark until they'd conducted an environmental impact study on your proposed flood.

I'm still trying to resolve a complaint with the Human Rights Commission on how many minorities I'm supposed to hire for my building crew.
Immigration and Naturalization are checking the green-card status of most of the people who want to work.

The trades unions say I can't use my sons. They insist I have to hire only Union workers with Ark-building experience.

To make matters worse, the IRS seized all my assets, claiming I'm trying to leave the country illegally with endangered species.

So, forgive me, Lord, but it would take at least 10 years for me to finish this Ark."

Suddenly the skies cleared, the sun began to shine, and a rainbow stretched across the sky. Noah looked up in wonder and asked, "You mean you're not going to destroy the world?"

"No," said the Lord. "The government beat me to it."

Today's a new day Live your Best Day!

Video - The Most Fun Medium of Marketing!

Easy Video Producer Take a look around the internet today and one thing you’ll see more of is videos.More and more, even the ‘gurus’ are making use of this medium to advertise their products and services.
Do you doubt me on that?
If so, think about the last big launch?
Who was the guru and what did he say?
No, I don’t mean what did he write, I mean what did he ‘say’.
Because, invariably, every single launch that’s happened over the past few months not only had an element of video in its sales letter……in most cases, the video IS the sales letter.Yes, you may see a page with writing on it, but count the number of words.
Chances are, you could actually count the words in a matter of seconds.Before video I couldn’t imagine anyone would want to even attempt to count the words –the sales letters for big launches are way too long.And let’s face it, when it comes to high ticket, expensive products, the sales pitch has got be substantial as most people want to know as much as possible about a product before they splash out that amount of money.
The good thing with video is now you can write a sales pitch as long as you want, and people will most likely site there and watch it… especially if the delivery is entertaining.Now tell me, when was the last time you found a written sales letter entertaining?
I mean, yes, sometimes they are but, for the most part, you can’t afford to use humour in the written sales letter.

Video opens up avenues which were never available before to any business.Or, for that matter, any individual just wanting to get his or her diary online in video form.Sure, you could upload a video to YouTube or one of the multitudes of video sites, but not
everyone wants to stick their videos on a public forum that size.There may be certain types of videos available only to your clients – would you want everyone to see them.

Heck, I know of one martial artist who sticks videos on YouTube which are only supposed to be for his paid members.You can’t get to them through his site, but all you have to do is go to YouTube and type in his name and, hey presto, there they are.

Now, if you’re one of those people who want to keep their videos on individual sites, what happens if you’re not a techie.Well, if you’re anything like me, you’ll go through a whole load of trial and error.Sure, you’ll probably get the video onto your site, as I did, but it could take a whole day… as it did me.

Now, what if you had a facility to put your videos only on your site?And, what if that facility was so easy to use, it literally takes a few minutes to record, edit and upload?

Well, that facility is here, and I’ve used it. If only I had this a couple of years ago - it would have made my life a whole lot easier.
What is this new facility?
Easy Video Producer.
I’m not going to tell you how amazing it is or how much easier it has made my life or anything like that.
However, if I did, it would be true.

The good thing is, it’s available for nothing.Yup, absolutely free.
What more can you ask for?Try it out by clicking the link below… and…

Written by Ghulam Nabi Rezbi

You can visit the site at http://www.easyvideoproducer.com/clickthru.php?id=12813